Parties

I think this summer’s party will be the last one of it’s kind, at least for me. I promised some friends that I would have one. I’m actually not really looking forward to it for several reasons, which I’ll list later. Plus, there are just so many schedule conflicts what with people starting school in a few short weeks. Ironically, I doubt that junior high reunion will ever happen, and if it does, I bet it’s going to be at some time that’s inconvenient for me. Great.

I guess I’ll go the usual way of going out to dinner with a few close friends come December.

Parties are tiring. I feel like I have a responsibility to make sure my guests are occupied and have people to talk to. Being a hostess means that I hardly ever get to enjoy being around one group for a very long time, but I used to think it was rewarding just to see everyone enjoying themselves. 

I’ve been to many parties where people are overcome by the need to spend every second with their significant others, only to leave their other friends to figure out what to do for themselves. I’ve also been to parties where all of the guests are complete strangers. Then I feel like a complete outcast and wonder why on earth the person even bothered to invite me in the first place.

I guess it gets irritating when you try to invite friends in groups or friends who are sociable regardless, when half of them would care less that you invited them or not. 

It’s just not worth the effort to plan those kinds of parties. There’s virtually no reward to begin with. It kind of reminds me of doing volunteer work. You’re giving up your time to help others for, say, the good of society (unless you have ulterior motives like getting service hours, but hey, you’re essentially free labor), only to discover that people don’t seem to appreciate the effort you’ve put into your work. I love being bossed around and having my work tossed out. Yessiree. 

I have 2 parties every year. Assuming things go as planned, I will have invited different (mostly just larger rosters of) high school friends to 8 parties. This isn’t my rant about how little social interaction I get; well, at least not until I get to the end of this post. 

Parties. parties. parties.

1. Cost. I don’t care, but what’s the point if it costs so much to get a party going for these so-called friends when most don’t even care?
2. We’re all growing further apart. People who used to come to my parties every year now have other plans. I used to invite my junior high school friends to parties, but I realize that those are the only times I ever see them. I guess they’ve completely forgotten about me. 
3. I’m sick of people who like to run the show. I’ll be brutally honest and say frankly that I was not at all happy with those certain people who I met over the summer who completely segregated themselves from everyone else at my birthday party and essentially turned it into their own little reunion. Sure, there were other scattered groups at my party, but those people at least opted to interact with others. Don’t you dare act all high and mighty at my parties. I won’t ever invite you again. Or rather, don’t get on Angie’s bad side, because she holds the nastiest grudges I’ve been witness to. I think the group became a lot more inclusive when a few individuals left (or maybe it was one that bugged me). I invited people that I didn’t know too well, because I thought it would turn out for the better. I guess I was wrong. Reunions are nice, but that should have been second to the fact that it was my birthday party (a little bit late, I know). And that person had no business inviting other people. I should’ve and would’ve liked to invite them, but I didn’t stay in contact with them after the summer, so I decided against friending them on Facebook for the mere purpose of inviting them to a party that was already going to get pretty big. I guess he did that job for me. Why thank you. It’s funny to see some friends Facebook friending you a week before a party, because they have this idea that I’ll invite them once I’ve friended them. Way to go! I just think it’s terribly rude and inconsiderate. Maybe some people don’t think too much about it, but I think it’s offensive. 
4. Then you have the people that don’t show up at all. Some say they’d love to come and then back out a week or two before because they just came up with other plans. It’s lovely when those other plans involve hanging out with other people. I feel so unappreciated! Why thank you! It’s even worse when you find out directly from other friends a few days after your party that he or she spent the day with them (since your friend didn’t mention anything about hanging out with other friends). You know, I could be going to a concert tomorrow, and I could be hanging out with another friend (which would be a lot better, since then we could go to the Americana at night). Heck, I could even bring my friend along (assuming he would want to). But that’s just impolite. I agreed to go. Even if this isn’t quite a party as it is more of a "friends hanging out" type event, it’s still rude to bring uninvited guests (I’ll go into details about that later), even if the guest and the host are friends. It’s impolite to decline an invitation after accepting it just because you’ve recently made better plans with other, more important, friends. Even if a party isn’t too great, even if you don’t know anyone at the party except the host… you could do what a friend ought to do and just show up and say happy birthday. Put on a happy face and rant about it later in your journal. Then you have friends that tell you that they will only come to your party if a certain person comes. Lovely. You guys are wonderful people, do you know that? You should all win medals for the level of compassion you show towards your so-called friends. Thanks for being straightforward, I guess. What’s the meaning of inviting people who blatantly tell you to your face that they would care less about you and are only using you for other things? 
5. Finally, you have boyfriends and girlfriends. I guess I should be happy when I get to spend time with friends, which happens to be so rare nowadays. What’s better? One friend finds himself a girlfriend, who also happens to be my friend, and from that point on, he rarely ever talks to me. When he does, it’s either about his girlfriend, or he’s making some kind of request. Whenever I get invited anywhere, I feel like a rotten 3rd or 5th (depending on the number of "couples" going out) wheel. Heck. At my parties,I feel like they’re conjoined twins, granted, they’re not forced to be together because of some physical condition. They come, find some place to sit down, and remain there for a good majority of the party. No offense, but that’s just so incredibly boring. It’s different if they didn’t know anybody, but when the room is filled with friends, they could be more social. Ironically, it’s like they become 1 person or 1 family. One card signed by both. Happy birthday! Signed x and y. x said this. 

I guess these scenarios wouldn’t seem so pathetic if I could be more than just an onlooker. That’s my problem.

What got me started on this terribly long rant?

Well, my friend IMed me. He hasn’t talked to me in a while. When he does, it’s usually to rant about some fanboyish fandom or ask me to do something. We’ve grown apart. I used to think he was my best friend. My friendship with him and his girlfriend and other friends is essentially what prompted that other crazy post about feeling completely excluded. They have so much fun together. I used to talk to my friend every day. Then "couples" started forming left and right, and the next thing I knew, it seemed like everyone just disappeared. Of course, they just disappeared from my life. They are having a splendid time on their own, going to the beach, theatres, and elsewhere. Back to the conversation.

So I jokingly mention that I don’t have much of a social life (which is true), because he was "wow"-ed by the fact that I hadn’t gone to the Americana at night. Then he has the nerve to say that I should blame it on geographical location. Sure, I live 15 to 20 minutes away from some friends, and I don’t have a car. It’s not like his girlfriend drives either, but he’s more than willing to take her everywhere she wants to go. It’s also not that hard for me to ask my dad to drive me to places, simply because he understands the distance issue. In the long run, it’s just an excuse. While it may be somewhat of a satisfactory explanation for my current hermit-like state, it’s not enough of a reason. 

And the IMing continues (surprisingly). My friend asks me if he can bring another friend to my friend’s birthday party. She wasn’t invited, but I doubt my birthday friend would mind. I tell him to ask him upfront, since it is his birthday and not mine. Then my friend tells me he doesn’t talk to my other friend, and he doesn’t even know why he was invited. That’s nice. 

It’s really just an issue I have with some of my friends. Unfortunately, I’m not close enough with many that I’m sure would be much more considerate. 

Oh well. 

Friends suck. Then again, what friends are they? 

People suck. 

There. 

I woke up around 2 PM, after I spent some good many hours talking to Jackie about friends issues, before falling asleep at 4 AM. I’ve been sleepy this entire day. It’s hot. And sometimes, I feel like an idiot. 

I haven’t slept in my bed since before my trip. I’ve been sleeping on the sofa in the living room. My room’s a disaster, at the moment. I stopped cleaning, and, well, the sight’s kind of intimidating. It’s sometimes hard to sleep, because my brother’s hamsters are nocturnal, and the constant squeaking that originates from inside that cage drives me berserk. Maybe tonight I’ll dream about Eeyores and Tiggers. I haven’t been able to hug a stuffed animal to sleep in a long while.

Instant milk tea is surprisingly tasty. 

Iljimae has some Rurouni Kenshin like scenes. 

And now I feel like throwing a boot at someone. 

Yes, Angie as positive as ever!

Thanks to all of the people who I’ve seen and gone out with these last few days/weeks. I think those few hours were a bit like orange flavored medicine. They taste good, and they make you feel better too! 

Same to everyone who’s been commenting on LJ and talking to me on AIM (talking as in saying something worth saying).  And those people who’ve offered to hang out in the near future. 
 
I either take things way too seriously or I act completely ditzy sometimes. How annoying.